Inspiration from this Episode

“Sometimes characters from books or shows can help a kiddo validate or explain their feelings.  And then you can watch how the character resolves his “too big emotion” situation and see what applies in your home.”

“So, helping them learn how to self-sooth, and calm down, or tone down their emotions is wise.”  

“I am important, I am valued, I am not a failure, I can help, be included, and play an important role in my family.”

045 | Us & Kids: Big Emotions and Kids

Intro 

On today’s show, we're talking about big emotions in our kids. Last week, in episode 44, we talked about the adult brain and big emotions. There we split the brain into spaces where the emotions develop and where the feelings develop. 

Today we are focusing more on the emotional space because our kiddos are still developing their brains and so, where we can impact, for better mental health,...

Inspiration from this Episode

“The boat has a structure around it to help it float, even in stormy weather. Our relationships also need some structure around it to help it float - even in stormy weather.”

“As they grow in understanding your language and grow in their own language be patient.”

“Remember to be in control of yourself. Because as you lead, they will follow.”

043 | Us & Kids: Boundaries

Intro 

On today’s show, we are talking all about boundaries. It’s hard to believe that half of 2020 is done! Do you just feel overrun? The kids do what they want, don’t want to do what you want them to do...and cooperation is at someone else’s house...certainly not yours! So, what to do?  

Do you just give up - Oh my and oh well….maybe we’ll reset next year? I am not sure it’s worth the argument and fight and tension. The easy way out is their way, even if it’s not a good...

Inspiration from this Episode

 “The bonding or the connections with your little one starts with pregnancy.”

 “It gives the two of you, husband and wife, a way to bond around this little one, and starts to build that base for the two of you.”

 “So they want to connect to your smell, your touch, your eyes, and your voice. It settles them down.”

042 | Us & Kids: Father’s Day

Intro 

On today’s show, our topic is about fathers. I know Father's Day just passed last week and so we just wanted to let you keep thinking about it. There can be a lot of pressure around dads. And sometimes it's important to understand “What's my role in this?”. So I wonder what do you think, is being a dad great? Is having your husband next to you, as the dad, wonderful? Or are you both as husband and wife a little confused by what's the role of a dad?

Some people think it’s easier than being a mom. Well,...

Inspiration from this Episode

“What if there's a way that can bring in encouragement and safety and calm amidst the chaos of your home?”

“And sometimes, because we feel like we're limited in that emotional energy, we're hesitant to give it away.”

“So that you can bring some calm, maybe some gentle humor, maybe some reassurance that everything will be okay.”

040 | Us & Kids: Donut Day

Intro 

On today’s show, we’re going to talk about donuts. What does National Donut Day have to do with being married forever while you parent together? National Donut Day is on June 5th or the first Friday of June every year. Interestingly enough it comes out of the Salvation Army sending donuts throughout the camp during WWI, and the troops would enjoy a taste of home that brought encouragement and emotional support and joy.

Now you’re probably wondering, what does this have to do with our joy of eating donuts in our...

Inspiration from this Episode

“They have less emotional knowledge, and less emotional awareness. Not necessarily less emotional experience.”

“I want them to be able to absorb pain and use pain in a healthy and okay way.“

“Because I wanted her to be empowered by talking about it out loud on her own, forming her own thoughts, gathering her own courage to say her own experience and letting me just be the listener.”

038 | Us & Kids: Grief in a Child

Intro 

On today’s show, the topic we're talking about today isn't necessarily a really happy one. But it's a rather common one. And the topic is about grief or loss for a child and how they experience it, but also how we can help them develop skills to get through it. We usually think we know what grief means to us or other adults we know, but it might look a lot different to the kids in our life. 

To children, the loss or grief happens because someone or something...

Inspiration from this Episode

“Social distancing has made me lonely. Zoom calls, although better than nothing, don't cut it for me in the long haul.”

“Being connected to them, seeing them eye to eye, hearing their voices in automatic direct time and in the real same space.”

“Caring for my friends and about my friends and my family is natural human behavior and it's healthy.”

037 | Us & Kids: Angsty = Anger and Anxiety

Intro 

On today’s show, we are doing things a bit differently. We aren’t going to focus on our marriage, nor are we going to talk about parenting much. What we are going to be diving into is us, and how that can inevitably affect our partner and kids. 

It can be hard during this time to not get stuck in the spinning circle of that anxiety and then being angry for feeling anxious. We want to make sure that we manage our emotions and that our emotions aren’t managing us. When we are more...

Inspiration from this Episode

“He knew that the best thing he could do for me was listen, without many words.”

“How can I help you? And that question, may not have an answer, like I don't really have an answer for him, but it means I'm in it with you.”

“I understand you can't control everything and move forward based on what you can know and do as you move forward.”

036 | Us & Kids: Uncertainty Can Make us Crazy

Intro 

On today’s show, let’s be certain about what we’re talking about - uncertainty. There is so much going on and changing everyday in our homes, our hearts and our relationships. We are told one thing and then what feels like almost instantly that answer changes. 

Do we just have to sit and spin in circles because nothing's for sure? Or is there a way to keep ourselves calm and keep on track? When we take the time to understand that we can’t control everything, it helps us regain...

Inspiration from this Episode

 “From the minute they're born, we begin to influence their brain.”

 “Sadly, because this need to connect deeply is so significant that if it is not filled nicely with mom and dad then that need can carry over to other spaces.”

 “Demonstrate and live with intentional good behavior so that they can copy you. This is when bonding happens.”

035 | Us & Kids: How Velcro Helps Us Be Better Parents

Intro  

On today’s show, we're moving on to part two of this two part series. In the last podcast, we were talking about Velcro. We talked about how to be connected with your spouse, and about how to clean up those connections in case being velcro’d together isn't working very well. Sometimes there are too many fuzzies and other things that are blocking the good connections. 

We're going to continue that today, but today we're going to talk about bonding or Velcro...

Inspiration from this Episode

“We do have an impact if we pay attention to the long game and say, this is what I'm deciding.”

“Do you want the mess to create higher anxiety or do you want it to create lower anxiety?”

“Remember to be grateful, to think positive and content thoughts.”

032 | Us & Kids: Dismiss Depression, Negative Nonsense and Anxiety

Intro 

On today’s show, we are going to be keeping up with topics that are timely with everything going on. We are talking about what is happening in your home, with what is working or not working to keep those relationships together when we are all together so very much. It’s easy for strong overwhelming emotions to take over us during this time. 

Some of our worries and our anxiety can be taken on by our partners and kiddos if we’re not careful. One of the best ways we can become more aware of our feelings and struggles is to write down, on paper, all the...

Inspiration from this Episode

“Do you have fun with people you don't trust or are you always a little on the edge?”

“When you do things together, you share the time.”

“It becomes more solid or steady so that where you want to go as a family and as a couple is actually dependable.”

031 | Us & Kids: What the T?

Intro 

On today’s show, we are going to be discussing things that are affecting the entire world right now. In times of crisis and uncertainty, it can be easy for us to get ourselves worked up and use certain slang out of fear. I am going to talk all about the “T” words you can use to replace a not so friendly “F” word in our “What the ____” sentences. 

There are things we can do during this time to be intentional with our spouse's family while we are in such close quarters. It can be easy to get on each other's nerves if we’re not careful so if we can keep these...